So you’ve found the perfect partner and everything is great except the fact that their friends kind of hate your guts. While it’s not a requirement in your relationship that you become besties with your boo’s friends, it can make things awkward at social events if you aren’t. Here are some tips on how to win them over.
● Show That You Care About Your Partner. Your significant other’s friends may be defensive because they don’t think you’re the right fit. Prove them wrong. Psychologist Dr. Paulette Sherman says people “feel threatened when their good friend gets in a new serious relationship and they may feel that things will change or they won’t be included [so] set the tone by showing up and making an effort.” Support your boo, give them thoughtful gifts, and be passionate about things they’re passionate about. Basically, everything you were planning on doing but take it up a notch or two.
● Don’t Try Too Hard. You don’t need to set up an elaborate “date” where you squash any beef your SO’s friends may have with you. Just be yourself and give it time. If you go out of your way to curry favor, they’re likely to catch on and think you’re disingenuous. Let things flow naturally and extend to them the same kindness you’d want to receive on your end.
● Be direct. If you’ve been dating your boo for long enough that you’re thinking about marriage and their friends still aren’t feeling you, it is time to bring out the big guns. Kill them with kindness. Slide into their DMs and ask them how they are, follow up on things they’ve talked to you about, and laugh at their jokes. If nothing seems to be working, it’s time to consider this might be a them problem and that there’s not much you can do to get them to love you like their friend does.
HT: LifeHacker