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The Glenn Beck Program

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Glenn: Far-left is RUINING COMEDY

The far-left ruins nearly everything is touches. Thankfully, as proven in a recently released statement from M&Ms, large corporations are beginning to learn that consumers are tired of their woke policies. But there’s still one, major component of society that’s at risk of succumbing to the far-left’s cold, evil touch: Comedy. In this clip, Glenn explains how the left is RUINING comedy because it makes you happy and they HATE that you can enjoy life with them…

TranscriptBelow is a rush transcript that may contain errors

GLENN: I want to talk to you a little bit about the loss of meaning. This is one reason, I just when we such high suicidal rates now. Is because nothing is true. Nothing means anything.

Okay?

Nothing. Nothing.

And the things that are given meaning, are ridiculous. Okay?

Like, for instance, race. It's ridiculous. Why are we arguing about race?

Race doesn't make a difference. Nothing. Nothing.

It's the -- the merit inside of each of us. It is what you do with your life.

Everything that is given power today, is meaningless. And it's all part of that woke culture.

Last year, and I can't -- I can't take this. And I'm going to be going to address this once. Last year, the M&M spokescandies. There's no such thing as a spokes candy.

Got a refreshed look to reflect today's society. I don't know about you.

But as I'm getting ready to watch a movie, and I see the M&M guys strapped to that rocket, about to go off, all I'm thinking is, can we stop with this stupid commercial?

I've got my box of M&Ms. I want to watch the movie. I don't ever really fear for their life. But maybe that's me. Yesterday, the M&M brand continues, quote, to evolve, to reflect a more dynamic progressive world, that we live in.

Now, our lives were destroyed by, you know, the women -- you know, the womanly green M&M. And our life has been made much richer, when she became nonbinary. I don't know about you. Yesterday, the M&M Mars company made a statement announcing an indefinite pause on their spokes candies. Because they realize that even a candied shoe can be polarizing. Which is the last thing that M&Ms wanted, because they were just trying to bring people together. Really?

So their new spokesperson is Maya Rudolph, who spent three years on Saturday Night Live. You can find her funny or not find her funny. You know, whatever. The company says, they chose her, because they want to make things fun again. And she's still inclusive. Really?

Because here's the problem. You could have Jesus. But the minute Jesus comes down and your candy company says, say these lines, and they're woke lines, you know, a lot of people will be turned off by that. So you really stopped being inclusive. Name one figure that is inclusive right now, that's not polarizing to at least half the country.

Okay?

The reason why, because you have to play the game. If you're going to work for these companies, you have to have the right words, acronyms, slogans, you know, race.

This is inherently noninclusive. But I digress. So they're making this statement. And what a surprise. Right before the Super Bowl. And companies are learning, go woke. Go broke.

We're tired of companies trying to do more, than what we're asking them to do. When it comes to M&Ms. Here's what I want you to do: Make a yummy chocolate candy.

I don't even care if it melts in my hand. Because I got past that lie of yours, when I was seven. They do melt in my hand.

But they're yummy. You and your stupid spokes candy make no difference in my life, or the life of anyone in the world.

Your candy might. But the spokes candy doesn't.

No one ever, anywhere, in all of time, will say, you know, I was a once a little girl who thought I couldn't make it. But then that candy company put their yellow M&M, in comfortable sling back shoes, instead of the go-go boots. And I realized, I can do it. I am important.

It's not going to happen.

Now, go woke, go broke. Also applies to comedy.

The new woke Velma, people are surprised this is a disaster. I didn't even have to watch it. I could have told you, it was a disaster.

This is the HBO Scooby-Doo spin-off, which do not even include Scooby-Doo. Shaggy has been replaced by a black man named Norville. Fred is the only white character. So he's evil. He's a privileged misogynist. Who can't dress or feed himself.

Velma is a black Asian. And Daphne is half Asian and half white. And they're both bisexual. Obviously, there's more than one lesbian kissing scene.

Another scene features teenage boys kissing. And there's plenty examples of doinks. Sexualizing children.

So what happens when you let woke bullies take control of what should be considered funny?

See, they do what they always do. They don't write comedy. Because they don't believe comedy is funny.

They believe comedy -- you're not supposed to laugh. You're supposed to clap angrily. Yes! Finally!

They're making out. Yes. That's what their comedy is.

Now, I'm not against satire. Laughter is the test of truth. A joke is playful judgment.

It conceals the ugliness of the world. And it uncovers the ugliness of the world.

And leftists. Boy, they are not a group winning many beauty contests lately.

This is literally the subplot of one of the Velma episodes. Now, weird thing is that even the left, doesn't like the Velma show.

They don't like it. They got making out lesbians, and the white guys -- they don't like it. The telegraph called it the most hated TV series on TV.

It has four episodes out. Velma is already -- already the worst rated TV show in IMDB history. Its audience score is six.

But as always, the left isn't taking responsibility for their bad behavior. A review in Forbes said that Velma is so bad, in fact, that it's spawning conspiracy theories, that creator Mindy Kaling, made what is essentially a parody of what the right-wing thinks left comedy is really like.

What? What a stupid plan that would be. It's a common tactic, if a woke comedy fails, which it always does. They blame us. Conspiracy theorist.

The left loves to whine about the dangers of right-wing humor. I don't know if you saw this. But the European Union just released an 18-page report. The European Union. That's a government body, by the way.

An 18-page report, on how right-wing comedy is a weapon.

Now, if a conservative, or a comedian just accidentally stumbles on a conservative joke, even by accident. Wait a minute. I didn't mean that.

No. I voted for Obama.

The left immediately destroys that person. And that joke, he meant that literally. He meant that.

When -- when he was drawing Yosemite Sam, and he was shooting. He meant that all people are like Yosemite Sam, and they should kill all people that are not like Yosemite Sam. What are you talking about?

The gist of their right-wing comedy argument is conservatives shouldn't be allowed to make jokes.

Because their humor is actually a complex. And when they say complex, they mean a mental illness. Literally, it's a mental illness.

And all they're doing is calling for violence. Ironically, a Pew study from 2020 proves kind of the opposite. I'm quoting.

White liberals disproportionately suffer from mental illness. Let me tell you, it's not even a competition. Masks? That has become a mental illness. There is -- there is no reason to wear a mask. That -- that fraud has been exposed long ago. Why are you still wearing a mask?

You have a mental illness at this point. They claim that conservatism is incompatible with political humor. And that liberalism suits it quite nicely. They say conservatism supports institutions. Which is ridiculous. Because at this point, the leftists are the institutions.

You know, they're at a drunk, at a karaoke bar. I can sing.

I'm so much better than you can sing.

I mean, they think they are capable of humor, because as the author about the book of right-wing comedy wrote, liberals are inherently free thinking. So here's what all of this is really all about.

Liberals don't like the fact that you can laugh. You know, what they hated about Ronald Reagan the most? He was happy.

He was funny. He was normal. They hated that.

Hated that. He makes jokes.

Oh, my gosh. They hate -- you can have fun, without them. That you can be successful, without them.

They hate what makes you happy. They hate what gives you meaning in life.

They hate what would give them meaning in life.

They really hate that we can laugh about ourselves.

They don't do a lot of laughing. I don't know if you've known that. I don't think I've seen many of them really laugh. I've seen them, ha, ha, ha, that's right. You stick it to them. I have seen that a lot.

Lorne Michaels, the creator of Saturday Night Live. He said in an interview, the reason why SNL tends to roast conservatives more than liberals, is, quote Republicans are easier than Democrats.

Democrats tend to take it personally. Republicans think it's funny.

There is nothing funnier, to me, than someone wrecking me.

You'll hear that a lot on the show. I pay these guys a lot of money. If it bothered me, it would stop, would it not stop, Stu?

STU: Oh, yeah. I built my career, on making fun of you.

GLENN: Exactly right. And who encourages it more than anybody else?

STU: You do.

GLENN: Exactly right. If you can't laugh at yourself, then what -- who are you?

Who do you think you are? The M&M Mars company?

With their dopey spokes candy? That's important.

That's really important. You know, so we're going to give them a message of hope and inspiration and fun.

See, conservatives think that their sincerity on their spokes candy, is funny.

They don't get the joke


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